Clan Conspiracies.

On Monday, I brought 'someone' home to meet the family.
He was subjected to the expected interrogation and mild insults.
All manageable.

We were, however, luckily enough to have missed a certain brother-in-law, who was absent due to some twist of fate. What a relief.

It was the annual Haymore pumpkin carving/painting FHE, and we, of course, were determined to walk away with the best design respectively.

By the end of the night, we had both completed veritable masterpieces, I with swirling carved forms and he with a sculpted depiction of Oogie Boogie from The Nightmare Before Christmas.

The drive home consisted of debating whose was better. He insisted that mine was not technically 'Halloween' worthy, and therefore inferior while I maintained that my concept was entirely superior.

Being the saint that I am, I offered that we might both consider ourselves grand prize winners, I in the 'Autumn' category and he in the 'Halloween'. But he swiftly refused, claiming that he and only he was worthy of 'gold place'. (I'm pretty sure this is a mixture of 'gold star' and '1st place', but who knows?...)

We decided that the only way to settle it was to take a vote and seeing that everyone in my apartment would naturally vote for me, I decided to post it to Facebook. Leave it up to the good people of the web to decide.

The voting started off well, and it wasn't long before I was in the lead.

But apparently, I was not fully aware of the bond he had somehow formed with every single member of my immediate family during such a short visit. Because less than 24-hours later, he had already earned the entire population's votes.

Including several of the family dogs.

This is why I both love and hate my family at the same time.
Love because they always come together and do things as a team.

Hate because, in this instance, the team effort was aimed at destroying me and my pumpkin personally.

In fact, since writing this post, there have been several new additions to the 'We Love Dan' club. Pretty sure this is mutiny of some kind.

So thanks a bunch, fam.
I have never met such a determined group of people so set on watching me squirm. And let me tell ya, you've succeeded.

I was told blood ran thicker than water. But now...?
I see how it is.

So Quotably Quotable.

So... haven't posted much lately.
Can't decide whether it's because school started and I actually have a life (debatable) or because I've run out of oddities to document. Probably the latter, right?

Please stop laughing.

Okay! Fine! FINE!
If you're so intent on making me spill, I guess I'll just have to appease the masses.

Here is a random sampling of 'Life at Corinner-Elly's Apartment'. Part I. (Because I am sure this is just the beginning of what will turn out to be a very, very long documentary.)

I'd like to name this segment, 'The Nose Hair Removal Fiasco'. Please excuse the accidental few seconds at the end of the clip. I'm still trying to figure out my phone's video capabilities. It's a tricky little bugger...

Are you confused? Disgusted? Disturbed? Still reading?

I know I sound like a broken record, but we are buddies.
They're my best friends, that's it.

But, know what?
You guys really need to start acknowledging all of my movie quoting efforts. I'm feeling cinematically under-appreciated.

I bet you a million dollars that I've quoted at least one movie, if not more, in every post I've ever written. And so, I'm feeling bold, here's what I'm going to do!

If you can tell me not only what movie the above quote is from, but also list one movie from all of my other posts (there are only like fifty, don't be a baby), I will give you something.
Something amazing.

You can submit your guesses however you'd like.
Feel free to be creative. I will accept one ginormous comment on this post, comments on each of the individual postings specifically, answers spelled out in alphabet soup...
it's really up to you.

Kapeesh?
So ready, set... GO!