She practically died when someone searched 'Google' in Google.
That'll break the Internet, you know.
So it's no surprise that upon receiving countless messages over the course of the past few months, documenting the errors 'PostMortem Doctor Watson' and 'SkypeNames' had encountered, Corinner-Elly began to panic.
The choices were simple:
A) hyperventilate and die
-or-
B) ask for help.
Naturally, there was only one person to turn to.
The laptop doctor.
"Daddy?" she mustered up the courage, "Do ya' think you could help me out here, fer' a sec?"
"What seems to be the problem?" he willingly offered.
"Oh, only just about everything.", she frowned.
And then, he worked his magic.
Sparks flew, hours passed, screams were suppressed and...
Skype finally installed.
"Phew." I gasped, sweat rolling down my face, "How do you do this everyday?"
"Hmm?..." Dad mumbled while swallowing another gulp of Diet Cherry Dr. Pepper.
"So, is she gonna make it?" I breathed while patting the keyboard's worn keys, "She's all I have you know."
"Oh," he sighed," she just decides to take a lunch break every once and a while.
"That's a weird thing to say," I thought, "but she does have cookies so... I guess it makes sense."
"Well this is goin' slower than a herd of turtles tramping through peanut butter." Dad muttered, "How much space do you have on your hard drive anyway?"
I gave him a blank stare.
And possibly the stink eye.
Deftly maneuvering the built in mouse to the My Computer icon and then to the bottom of the scroll down menu with a flick of his wrist, the gigabyte count began to multiply.
"What in the world do you have on here!?" he questioned incredulously.
"Just the essentials." I responded, "And all of that digital scrapbooking stuff Jenny insisted I could not live without."
You see, what you must know is that my oldest sister Jenny has been a sales woman since the day of her birth. No jokin'.
I'm pretty sure she had the nurses hooked on Pampered Chef, Mary Kay, Xango, MAX, Tupperware, Cookies by Design and twenty other popular products before they even had time to swaddle her fast talking little butt.
Thus, I was no match for her persistence when she decided to share the wealth of digital scrapbooking templates, papers and wording she had inherited from her mother-in-law.
"Will they fit?", I inquired warily.
"No problem." she reassured.
A quick scan of the dreaded desktop folder revealed the truth.
"FORTY-FOUR gigabytes!!!" Dad practically screamed, "That is HALF of your carrying capacity!"
"It's not my fault!" I wimpered from my hiding spot under the table, "Have you MET your eldest daughter? She's very persuasive."
"Yah, but in the meantime your system is choking!", Dad exclaimed.
"I'm sorry!" I shrieked, "Don't you feel the least bit sorry for me?!"
"You know I'm just teasin'." he softened before starting a full computer scan, "There's probably only a hundred er' so problems."
"A HUNDRED???", I swooned.
Just before blacking out, I recognized the soft hum of his hearty chuckles exiting the room.
4 comments:
Eh he he he he hhh ehe he... before they could swaddle her fast talking little butt.... eh he he eehe he he heeh he he I remember a time when I was a fresh new in-law that I patiently listened to the wonders of some magic Asian fruit for like 2 hours before I escaped.... ehe he heehe he he heeee... I know better now- I make a quick exit or mock the product relentlessly.
You know we love ya Jenny...
And you pale in comparison to another relation who shall remain nameless in case she reads Corin's blog. But her names rhymes with Schmant Schm.............
Apparently my rhyming skills have gone way down hill because I've been sitting here for a good twenty minutes now trying to figure out what the heck that rhymes with? :P
But I think I have a pretty good idea... ;)
Ouch....
PS- I want ALL my scrapbooking stuff back!
Post a Comment