Stalking isn't Serendipitous.

I feel like 'It's a Small World' should be playing on a constant loop in the back of my head sometimes. I mean, what are the chances?

On second thought, if 'It's a Small World' was always playing on a constant loop in the back of my head, I just might have to impale myself on the closest sharp object. Because we all know how annoying that ride can be. And they don't even let you collect any of the ba-jillion coins along the way!

Rip-off artists...

But the point is: everywhere I turn, I see someone I know or someone who, under closer inspection, has some sort of tie to me.

Take for instance, my Family Finance class.
I shove my way through hoards of people into an auditorium with, at least, 2 million students trying to find somewhere to plant themselves. And who do you suppose I end up seated by?

A girl who just happens to be from Mt. Pleasant who happens to relate to my drive-in movie stories who happens to have a cousin who knows a kid who just happens to have been in my singles ward and so on and so forth.

Needless to say, we don't have trouble gossiping er'... talking.

And if that weren't enough, not ten minutes after thinking of re-connecting with someone who I haven't seen since freshman year, who should I pass en-route to my car?
You guessed it. (Cue Twilight Zone music.)

Then, I swear Gem comes home everyday from UVU with a new story about someone we know who is in her class or who she passed on campus or who taught her to longboard. And suddenly I'm feeling like closing the curtains because this is starting to feel like a creepy stalker moment.

(Hehehe... What is life without puns?)

Speaking of stalkers, wouldn't you say that boys are more inclined to be 'stalkers' in the everyday sense of the word?? I'm not talking innocent Facebook browsing.

Because, heaven knows, that is completely harmless.
Believe me. I know.

I'm talking 'unwanted, obsessive attention by individuals to others'. (Yes, thank you Wikipedia.)

Granted there are some girls who go out of their way to throw themselves at their current crush in the most ridiculous of ways, but in my experience, boys are much more likely to secretly track a girl's movements, likes, dislikes and various other details in attempts to woo her with their thoroughness.

The thing is, unless this attention is warranted and/or invited, it just comes across as creepy.

As in, 'I know you're staring at me from across the room so cut it out or I'm gonna prance over there and slap you silly'.

Does this sound at all familiar to anyone but me?
Cuz' it's practically the story of me life.

But I know what yer thinkin': "You have a public blog! Get over it!" And that isn't a completely un-warranted thought...

I suppose it's just a sacrifice I am willing to make.

Speaking of sacrifice, look what I made in the wee hours of the night under threat of death from my office management. Okay, okay. Maybe not threath of 'death' but certainly duress.

I think it turned out marvelously!

I mean, seriously. They hire a front desk attendant and whaddya' know? Her duties somehow magically expand to include graphic design, culinary artifice, children's activites, office decor, plant sustinance and beyond.

Not to mention, my mere presence imbues pure joy.

(Remember my first post about humility? Yah. Me too.)

I do believe a raise is in or-DAH!

Just as a sidenote, 'See You There!' is not an open invite to all stalkers. If I do 'see you there', woo boy, you're gonna wish you were never born.

I carry Mace.