She goes around in circles 'til she's very, very dizzy.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

By All Accounts, It Doesn't Make Sense...

Ever seen those girls?
You know. They're all over the place.
Oh, come on. You've seen the type.
Know what I mean? No?

Those girls.
The one's who have a waist circumference of, like, 2 inches.
The ones who may just snap given the smallest wind.

Uh huh. Them.

Here's my question: How in the world do they fit all their organs in there? I mean, really. There's just no way.

Quite frequently, I see one of 'them' walk by and think to myself, "She's gotta be missing a liver or something."

Riddle me this: there are 22 internal organs in the human body, the majority of which (I'm guessing), are located somewhere in the torso. So it's only reasonable to assume that they all have to fit in there somewhere, right?

Apparently not. Because there seems to be an entire female sub-population that has clearly been jipped, in some form or another, out of vital appendages.

Of course, I speak as an outsider.
I'm sure you've noticed, I'm no Pixie Stick.
I have room enough for my insides plus some.

But still a sissy girl, right?

HaHA! There's where you are WRONG!
Looky here. Yah, that's right.


I added oil to my car. WOOT.


Oh, but ick. Look at the grossness.

Alright, alright. Maybe I am a teensy bit sissy. But I mean really. No ten minute job should require so much grime.

Seriously.
I'm just trying to be a responsible car-driver-person here. In the past, all I had to do was bat my eyes at Daddy. But now that I'm on the eve of the big 2-1, I figured I could broaden my horizons. Look on the wild side. Be a rebel without a cause.

Figure out how to pop the hood?...

Needless to say, I only stood studying the engine, eyes glazed over, for a few minor moments. Then, being the adult that I am, I ran inside and asked Daddy, "Okay. Tell me one more time?... You take the thingy out of where and then do WHAT?"

By the way, do you know how hard it is to get that wobbly little dipstick back into its hole, especially when you're trying to hold onto it with two fingers, max? One-and-a-half, if that's even possible?

Hard. Times a bazillion.

But never fear.
Good news is: I have all my organs.

And a little grease never hurt anyone. Yet. 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

WOW! I've never added oil to my car and could never tell you how to find the dip stick or what to do with it. Good for you!!!
And I'm full of organs and lots, and lots of LOVE!!! (yeah, that's what it is) ;)

Falling Stars said...

Actually, I believe if you leave dirty oil on your skin too long it will burn the flesh right off. ^_~

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